Who Said Ricans Were Demanding?

JLo and El Skeletor have really tried to outdo themselves this time. I guess I'd be a bit demanding, too, if I'd agreed to perform in the world's coke den along with reggaeton "artists," Wisin & Jandel. Jeebus, you know that crowd's going to be full of thug wannabes and their wannabe chola tecata girlfriends. But college-educated bi-lingual nannies' assistants and a floor at the Cartagena Hotel? Please...Gimme bottles of spring water collected in the mountains by FARC hostages and my own sicario houseboy. Now those are some real treats from Colombia fit for Rican celebrity.